final exit

my love affair

with black and white holga portraits 

continues…

noir nights in tokyo

hanging out at the new york bar at the park hyatt.

[yes, that one in lost.in.translation.]

the smoking gun.

for relaxing.suntory.times.with mistress m

wedding

there is a certain pain associated with weddings

a heady mixture

of happiness, excitement, fear and a slight tinge of heartache

yes, heartache

do we see this massive journey that two people are embarking on?

this quest to prove to all mankind

that as human beings we do not live our lives

 alone.

hotel

oh hotels

living breathing organisms

little cells of life

living breathing in little designated pockets

passages

strangers

lovers

travelling in streams

like blood

a dreamy haze

lying on your

bed

a window

reminds us of the pulsating life

that exists

outside

this life

black and white

 a chandelier

at the oriental

the building next to us

no

the left of us

 at night

standing beneath

the

sheltering

 sky

thinking of you

thinking of   you

thinking of

you

noir night with nai

nai our friend

he is a manchester united fan.

we are not

that is not to say,

rivals on the field

cannot sleep on the same bed

when the match is over

the dreaming

lately i have been getting strange

disemboweled dreams

of the open sky

visions of myself looking out of the window

as a child

what do i make of this?

a freudian reference to an incident

of my

past?

me

self portraits are odd things.

there is an element of vanity involved (yes yes)

and there is an element of self sacrifice

really.

a step into the unknown. it is almost a leap of faith

to push the shutter without knowing what is behind that view finder

usually the results are extremely embarassing.

sometimes the results are pleasant.

and sometimes

just sometimes

you catch a glimpse of yourself you never knew
existed

fish

so some sundays we go on a road trip to remote far flung reaches of the island in search of fish

so we would drive and i like to stick the camera next to the car window and hope for a lucky shot

and eventually we would reach the big big fish place.
i like the surroundings more than the fishes

actually

we would return and talk about fishes.

“small ones!” i say

“no, no big ones!” you say

drive

driving out of my old neighbourhood.

i grew up here but now they are building things everywhere so things look so different now

drive drive drive